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10 Weeks of Mindfulness at Work

June 22, 2023

Welcome to week six of “10 Weeks of Mindfulness at Work” where you’ll discover simple tips and techniques to enrich your day with mindfulness. I hope you find inspiration from this series!

– Not Knowing is Most Intimate

One of the concepts in mindfulness is that “not knowing is most intimate”. What this means is that no matter what happens in life, the intent with mindfulness is to see clearly what’s happening in the present moment and not add more content to it with predictions about what’s next. After all, what’s next is unknown. 

Now, this doesn’t mean not to plan for the future; however, it does mean not to live into an imagined outcome about a future that hasn’t yet unfolded. As Mark Twain famously said, “I’m an old man and have known a great many troubles, most of which never happened.”

– People Like Predictability

“Not knowing” seems like an easy enough concept, but it can be challenging to practice. As I wrote in last week’s post, people often fill in gaps of unknown information with stories; it gives them a sense of control and predictability in their lives.

Consider someone who just had a medical diagnostic test. The entire week before getting the test results back, they’re sure they have the disease they were being tested for. They find it impossible to concentrate at work, since they keep planning for a future with this medical condition. Maybe they have the condition; maybe they don’t – but before they get their results, they simply don’t know.

So, if you find you’re stressed about what’s next, notice if you’re making predictions about the future and remind yourself you don’t know. Will the diagnostic test come back positive? Remind yourself, “I don’t know and it’s ok not to know.” Will I be able to juggle work responsibilities and medical appointments? Remind yourself, “I don’t know and it’s ok not to know.”

Any time you want to make a prediction about what’s next, simply remind yourself that the future is unknown. Rather than fill in gaps of unknown information with predictions about what next, simply repeat the refrain, “I don’t know and it’s ok not to know.”

Because the reality is that we simply don’t know what the next month will bring, or even the next hour or the next minute.

Reflection: Have you ever reacted to an imagined future outcome that never actually happened?

WEEK SIX PRACTICE SUGGESTION: Notice if you’re making a prediction about a future outcome. Instead, can you embrace the unknown?

**99¢ Special

Be on the lookout for a 99¢ Kindle promotion in July to celebrate the 10th anniversary of “Meditation Illuminated: Simple Ways to Manage Your Busy Mind,” a step-by-step book for beginning meditators. Available in Kindle, paperback and audiobook.

10 Weeks of Mindfulness at Work

June 15, 2023

Welcome to week three of “10 Weeks of Mindfulness at Work” where you’ll discover simple tips and techniques to enrich your day with mindfulness. I hope you find inspiration from this 10-week series!

– How to Meditate

Meditation is a proven way to become mindful. To practice, set a timer for a few minutes and follow these simple steps for a short meditation break at work — or anywhere else you’d like!

Step #1. Sit up straight, without being rigid. Keep your spine aligned with your head and neck. Gently close your eyes. Try to release physical tension, keeping your body relaxed but your mind alert. (Note: see Week 2 of this series for tips on releasing physical tension.)

Step #2. Choose an anchor — a neutral object to focus on that doesn’t stimulate your mind. Examples of commonly used anchors are: your breath; the feeling of your body; a word repeated silently, such as “peace”; sounds, such as ocean waves; or an object to hold, such as a smooth stone. 

Step #3. Rest your attention on your anchor. Every time your mind wanders, often each second or two for beginners, gently refocus on your anchor. Continue refocusing on your anchor for the rest of your practice time.

– Exercising Your Mind’s Muscle

Meditation is a practice of returning to your immediate experience in the present moment. Again and again and again. Notice when your attention wanders, and then return your attention to your anchor, as in Step #3 above.

This process is key to the practice of meditation, since it exercises your mind’s “muscle.” Just as the repetitive motion of abdominal crunches can build your core strength, the repetitive noticing and returning builds your power of awareness.

– Accepting Your Wandering Mind

Meditation isn’t a practice of stopping your thoughts. Thoughts will continue to arise, since it’s the nature of the mind to generate STUFF (an acronym I use for Stories, Thoughts, Urges, Frustrations and Feelings).

The intent of meditation isn’t to suppress thoughts and feelings. Consider anything that draws attention from your anchor to be like a cloud passing or like a boat floating by as you watch from the riverbank. Allow it to pass without judgment, and gently refocus on your anchor. The repetitive action of refocusing trains you to become mindful.

WEEK THREE PRACTICE SUGGESTION: Focus on just three breaths (or more if you’d like). Notice your chest or belly rising and falling — or the coolness of the air as you breathe in and its warmth as you breathe out. If your mind wanders, gently refocus on your breath, without judgment or internal comment.

**Celebrating a 10th Anniversary

Be on the lookout for a 99¢ Kindle promotion in July to celebrate the 10th anniversary of “Meditation Illuminated: Simple Ways to Manage Your Busy Mind,” a step-by-step book for beginning meditators. Available in Kindle, paperback and audiobook.

Managing Social Media Distractions

March 9, 2023

Do social media distractions affect your productivity?

Social media use can drain your productive time — and it can be addictive. Every time you check social media, it reinforces the neural pathways in the brain that crave this distraction. As a result, checking your device for the latest post can become a habitual behavior. If you’d like to break the habit of social media distractions, here are some tips to get you started.

First, realize that urges are part of the human experience. Everyone has STUFF — the Stories, Thoughts, Urges, Frustrations and Feelings that cycle in the mind. But just because you experience an urge, doesn’t mean that you have to immediately answer its call. This is where awareness comes in.

Often people act upon their STUFF unconsciously. So, the second step in breaking this habit is to notice your urge to check social media. Perhaps you could keep a tally in the notes section of your phone, indicating each time you check social media. Or perhaps you could stand up when checking social media, if you’re typically sitting down. Most importantly, try to do something different, so your habitual behavior isn’t automatic.

Next, add space between your urge and your response. Let’s say you check social media every half hour. Try to gradually increase the times you check your device, until you’re checking on a manageable schedule — such as the morning before work, lunchtime and the evening after work.

And finally, notice your experience. Rather than forcefully pushing the urge away, become aware of what it’s like to take charge of your urges. Are you experiencing agitation in your mind? Tightness in your body? Again, awareness is key. As the old saying goes, “If you can name it, you can tame it.”

If you like this post, please consider sharing it — as long as sharing isn’t a social media distraction that affects your productivity!

Reduce Anxiety by Practicing “Not Knowing”

March 16, 2020

With the uncertainty about the coronavirus comes a tremendous amount of stress. Many questions about the virus and its implications remain unanswered—and may continue to be unanswered for the weeks and months ahead. Immediate challenges from the virus, such as illness or loss of work, bring stress. This stress is often compounded by worries about the future. Even if someone isn’t experiencing challenges at this moment, anxiety can still ensue by worrying about what’s next.

From a mindfulness standpoint, an effective technique to help reduce stress is to practice “not knowing.” By not imagining outcomes based on fears, you can remain open and present to what is. To practice, try to notice when you worry about the future and then remind yourself that you don’t know. Will this last for months? I don’t know. Will I get sick, or will my loved ones get sick? I don’t know. Will life return to the way it was? I don’t know. This practice can help your anxieties lose some of their power, as you realize that your mind may be creating stories about what’s to come— when in reality, you simply don’t know.

It can be freeing to notice your thoughts without getting lost in them—and instead, live in the immediacy of the present moment. As of today, the present moment reveals that the coronavirus issue is upon us and life as we know it is changed. Beyond that, we simply don’t know what’s next. 

All we know is that we’re all in this together, since we’re all part of the interconnected web of life. And we can only hope that it’s our interconnectedness, rather than our social distancing, that helps pull us through this crisis. Meanwhile, reminding yourself “I don’t know” may help ease anxieties about the future, as you bring your awareness to the present moment.

If you’d like to try a meditation to help you release stories about the future that can create stress, check out my latest podcast episode here: https://joyrains.com/episode-8/.

If you’d like to meditate regularly at home, consider setting up a dedicated meditation space. To find tips on designing your space, visit https://porch.com/advice/the-ultimate-meditation-room.

Responding vs. Reacting

February 26, 2020

The practice of meditation helps you respond to life’s events consciously, rather than react unconsciously. This can go a long way towards reducing stress. For example, if you’re waiting in line to pay for your purchases and someone cuts in front of you, rather than going into an immediate stress-related reaction (such as shouting “How dare you cut in front of me! I’ve been waiting 20 minutes!), meditation can help you notice events without having such a strong emotional reaction. You may be able to calmly say to the encroacher, “Excuse me please, people are waiting in line here. Please step to the back of the line.”

Practicing meditation doesn’t have to take long; simply sit in a quiet place for a few minutes, close your eyes and bring all your attention to your breath, noticing your chest rising and falling, or noticing the coolness of the air when you inhale and its warmth when you exhale. Any time your mind wanders, gently bring your attention back to your breath. This practice, even if done for a few minutes a day, can help recharge and center you.

If you’d like to listen to guided meditations, check out my new podcast, Mindful 180. https://joyrains.com/category/mindful-180-podcast/

3 Simple Tips to Reduce Stress

February 12, 2020

Got stress? Here are three tips to help you center and find balance.

Tip #1: Create a Stress-Free Zone at Home

Have a “stress-free zone” in your home. You can learn to associate a dedicated place with quieting your mind, a place where you sit for a few minutes each day and focus on your breathing. You could devote an entire room to this practice, or just a corner of a room—or even a favorite chair. One busy professional carved out a small space next to the dryer in her basement laundry room. Installing a sliding translucent screen for an outer wall transformed this basement nook into a quiet meditation space. Another person transformed a bedroom corner into a private space by using a sheer curtain as a divider. Your “stress-free zone” should include a dedicated place to sit, such as a chair or meditation cushion, and could also include inspirational items, such as books of short readings, music, or artwork. Taking the time to pause—even for a few minutes a day—can go a long way towards managing stress.

Tip #2: Weave Mindful Moments Into Your Day

Consider weaving “mindful moments” into your day-times when you quiet the chatter in your mind and bring your focus into the present moment. For example, when you walk to the coffee machine in the office, bring all your attention to the soles of your feet as they touch the ground. Any time your mind wanders, gently bring your awareness back to your feet. Or when you eat lunch, bring all your awareness to the process of eating: the pace of your eating, the taste of the food, the colors of the food on your plate. When your attention wanders, gently bring it back. This process of bringing all your attention to what’s happening in the present moment can also go a long way towards managing stress.

Tip #3: Do a body relaxation meditation.

Sit in a quiet place and gently lower your eyelids to a soft gaze or a full close. Slowly move your awareness throughout your entire body, either starting with your feet and working your way up, or starting with your head and working your way down. Pause at each muscle group and see if you can release any tension. You may want to silently say to yourself “relax” with each inhale, and “release” with each exhale. Or you may want to imagine a muscle group getting warmer and warmer until the tension melts away. If you find that you’re more relaxed, see if you can develop a muscle memory of what your body feels like when it’s relaxed, so you can tap into that memory in times of stress.

These three tips are simple to practice, and best of all, they’re free! They don’t require any special equipment or training. All they require is remembering to stop and pause—if only for a few moments.

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