10 Weeks of Mindfulness at Work

Welcome to week five of “10 Weeks of Mindfulness at Work” where you’ll discover simple tips and techniques to enrich your day with mindfulness. I hope you find inspiration from this series!

– Believing Your Stories

Have you ever told yourself a story that wasn’t true? I sure have. Early in my speaking career, I was thrilled to be the monthly speaker at a meeting of the National Association of Professional Saleswomen. Part way into the presentation, I introduced an exercise where each person blew up a balloon and then stomped on it. 

As the air filled with the sounds of more than 100 bursting balloons – and the sounds of laughter — one woman scowled and shook her head in disapproval. My attention zeroed in on her as the voice in my head said, “She hates your presentation.” And of course, I believed that voice. I felt completely deflated.

– Objective Reality or Illusions?

Afterward, when everyone had filed out of the room, she approached me. I’ll never forget her words, as she said, “I loved your message, but the noise of the balloons breaking was so loud, it reminded me of my difficult childhood, growing up in a violent neighborhood.” Wow. Her reaction had nothing to do with me; yet, I created a story in my mind where it had everything to do with me.

Now, we all create stories in our minds; it’s the way we make sense of the world. Yet, often people fill in gaps of missing details with stories that may seem like objective reality, when they’re actually just illusions. 

For instance, if your manager calls you into a special meeting, does your mind spin with stories beforehand? Perhaps you’re worried about being reprimanded,  demoted or even being fired.

– Noticing Your STUFF

Mindfulness helps you notice your STUFF — The Stories, Thoughts, Urges, Frustrations and Feelings that cycle in the mind. This awareness enables you to  realize, “I’m telling myself a story which may or may not be true.”

Noticing your stories can be very freeing. Rather than getting lost in the emotion of an outcome which is unknown at this point, you are living in the immediacy of the present moment. As the magnet on my refrigerator wisely states, “Don’t believe everything you think.”

Reflection: Have you ever reacted to a story that turned out not to be true?

WEEK FIVE PRACTICE SUGGESTION: Notice the stories you tell yourself. Are they true? Are they useful?

**Celebrating a 10th Anniversary

Be on the lookout for a 99¢ Kindle promotion in July to celebrate the 10th anniversary of “Meditation Illuminated: Simple Ways to Manage Your Busy Mind,” a step-by-step book for beginning meditators. Available in Kindle, paperback and audiobook.

10 Weeks of Mindfulness at Work

Welcome to week four of “10 Weeks of Mindfulness at Work” where you’ll discover simple tips and techniques to enrich your day with mindfulness. I hope you find inspiration from this series!

– A Restless Monkey and a Wild Horse

Nineteenth-century Indian mystic, Swami Vivekananda, wrote of the rampant activity of the mind, comparing it to that of a “restless monkey that becomes drunk and then is bitten by a scorpion.”

I love that image! I also love image of the untrained mind like a wild horse, as in this old story: A man, attempting to ride a wild horse, gallops past a farmer. The farmer shouts to the rider, “Where are you going?” The rider shouts back, “Don’t ask me, ask the horse!”

– Training Yourself to Be Mindful

The good news is that you can learn to train that horse (your mind), enabling you to direct it where you want it to go, rather than letting it run wild. 

When you train yourself to be mindful, you’re learning to focus on the immediacy of the present moment, rather than being tossed about by your “STUFF” — an acronym I use for Stories, Thoughts, Urges, Frustrations and Feelings.

Like learning any new skill, it takes time and practice to become mindful. But your  brain has neuroplasticity, or the ability to form new neural pathways and learn new ways of being in the world. 

– Becoming Less Reactive

Developing mindfulness has so many benefits, both personally and professionally. For one, it helps you become less reactive, as if you’re putting a space between life and your response to life. 

That extra space can be quite handy. For instance, let’s say you’re at work and your colleague sends you an email at the end of the day. You don’t like the tone of his email; you feel anger rising in you as you read his message. Your fingers take to the keyboard to fire back a response, giving your co-worker a piece of your mind.

But wait! Here’s where mindfulness comes in. You notice your reaction. You realize you  don’t have to respond to his email immediately. You decide to wait until morning, when you can view the situation with a fresh outlook. This is the power of mindfulness. The power of adding space. The power of responding consciously, rather than reacting unconsciously.

Reflection:

-Have you ever added space between life and your response to life?

-How about your mind, does the restless monkey or wild horse comparison resonate with you?

WEEK FOUR PRACTICE SUGGESTION: Notice the activity of your mind. Is it restless? Can you add “space” before responding to events?

**99¢ Special

Be on the lookout for a 99¢ Kindle promotion in July to celebrate the 10th anniversary of “Meditation Illuminated: Simple Ways to Manage Your Busy Mind,” a step-by-step book for beginning meditators. Available in Kindle, paperback and audiobook.

10 Weeks of Mindfulness at Work

Welcome to week two of “10 Weeks of Mindfulness at Work” where you’ll discover simple tips and techniques to enrich your day with mindfulness. I hope you find inspiration from this 10-week series!

– Starting with the Body

During my college years, I volunteered on a crisis-intervention telephone hotline. One evening, a preteen girl called, crying uncontrollably. She had just run away from home. Thankfully, she called the hotline, and thankfully she agreed to do a Progressive Muscle Relaxation exercise with me. As she began to release tension in her body, her breathing slowed and her mind settled — enabling us to discuss her next steps. 

– Shifting from Unconscious to Conscious

This exercise helped her relax, since it enabled her to become aware of the difference between how a muscle feels when it’s tensed vs. how a muscle feels when it’s relaxed. As the old saying goes, “If you can name it, you can tame it.”

But awareness of the body doesn’t always come naturally. People often ignore their bodies and instead, solely focus on the STUFF (Stories, Thoughts, Urges, Frustrations, Feelings) in their minds — like their head is a balloon with a knot tied at their throat, and that’s where consciousness ends. 

The Progressive Muscle Relaxation exercise gives you a tool to “untie the knot” and bring consciousness to your entire body. Try this while sitting in a chair for a short relaxation break during the day — or while lying in bed to help you sleep at night.

– Using a Simple Tool to Reduce Stress

To practice, start with your feet and work your way up to the top of your head. (Alternatively, start with the top of your head and work your way down to your feet.) Tense each muscle group for about five seconds, and then release it completely. Be careful not to strain. Pay attention to your muscles and notice how they feel tensed vs. relaxed. If you’d like, repeat tensing the muscle group a second time. Then move on to the next muscle group until you’ve relaxed your entire body. 

Any time your mind wanders, gently bring it back to noticing how your body feels. Take as much time as needed.

When you’ve finished practicing, try to develop a muscle memory of how it feels to relax, so you can call on this memory in the days and months ahead. 

WEEK TWO PRACTICE SUGGESTION: Try a Progressive Muscle Relaxation exercise at work or home. Here’s a guided version on the Insight Timer app.

** 99¢ Special

Be on the lookout for a 99¢ Kindle promotion in July to celebrate the 10th anniversary of Meditation Illuminated: Simple Ways to Manage Your Busy Mind, a step-by-step book for beginning meditators. Available in Kindle, paperback and audiobook.